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Confederate Letter
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Dr. Robert Hunter Peel Civil War Letter Surgeon, 19th. Mississippi Regiment Letter From Robert to "Sister"
Surgeons Office - 19th Miss" Regt" Feb" the 17th, 1864 Once more-dear Sister- I am in camp, and have resumed the duties of my office. Three days have passed since my return; three long and weary days to me, notwithstanding the many warm friends around one, and the hearty-"welcome home"- which greeted me from so many brave soldiers and rode through the Brigade. While thinking of the past few weaks, I am forcibly reminded that there is no Sweet unmingled with bitterness in this world; I met you and was happy; I left you and my heart is sad. I am not unhappy dear Sister! Oh no! I can never again feel miserable or entirely alone on earth while you live to love me. On the contrary, I am quite happy and contented, but mine is that subdued, tranquil sort of happiness, natural for those to feel who have suffered much. My greatest pleasure now is, to sit alone and commune with my own thoughts, full of bright hopes, animating prospects and tender ties, yet to be realized. The flowers you have planted must ever bloom fresh in the Summer of my heart dear Sister- and the bright hopes and aspirations your love has inspired will make me a better and a happier man. I shudder when I think by how slender a thread my destiny hung a few short weaks ago, and in my heart. I bless you as the object or instrument of all the happiness I hope for, expect or desire in this world. I will not suffer myself to anticipate my feelings, had I met a cold reception from you; my long hurried heart, withered and desolate, could have admited no other object, cherished no other hope. The bright world would have been a desert waste to me, and life itself a bitter mockery. Upon the blank pages of futurity, in my hours of doubt and sadness, I had sought to "map-out" my tortuous and uncertain course as I passed the noonday of my existence, and in the depths of my Soul I could but wish the eavening of life had come. But now, thank Heaven! And you - my guardian angel - the scene is changed; I have an object to live for; a new world is opened before me; new hopes , new aspirations animate me, and if I am spared to call you my own-dear Maud, you shall yet be proud of the man you have promised to love more than all the world besides. I have just learned from the daily papers, that the enemy are advancing into our State in several colums, from different quarters, and I tremble for our devoted people. I fear too that all communication with Northern Mississippi will be cut-off for some time, and my suspense will be terrible indeed, when I can no longer hear from the loved ones at home. Albert has applied for a "leave of absence" with the intention of going home, but will not start until he learns that the way is open. Add is in poor health and hopes to get a furlough next winter, if the brae boy is fortunate enough to escape the yankee bullits until then. It is now snowing fast, and the earth is as white and pure as a bridal-veil. Closely shut-up in my little tent, I shall each day regret that I did not insist on bringing you to Virginia with me. I could give you a nice home - insight of my own quarters until the cold winter is past, and could then situate you pleasantly with some friends of mine, when duty calls me away for a time. Many officers from Mississippi and elsewhere have their wives with them here, and they certainly appear to be the gayest and happiest persons I meet. Yet, were you here, I know you would be ever anxious about the dear ones at home, and in thus delaying our union, I thought I was acting for for the best, and I was willing then as I always am, to sacrifice my own inclinations and desires to the will or pleasure of those I love. I earnestly hope and believe that this year will determine the result of this cruel war, and leave us once more an independent and happy people. There can be no doubt of the final issue of this strugle, should our people only prove true to themselves, and should this ever be a conquered country it will be the fault of the traitors and the faint-hearted amongst us, and not to any superiority of courage or of numbers on the part of our enemy. I have been deeply pained to see the disaffection amongst the troops of Genl" Braggs, now Genl" Johnsons army, as I gathered the state of their feelings from conversations overheard amongst the privates of that command, while on the cars going to , and returning from home on furloughs. They are badly demoralized I fear, and many shrewd villians are adding fuel to the flame, by raising a spirit of enmity and jealousy between the sick and poor classes of our people. This is but a revival of the Red-Republican doctrine that once destroyed the liberty of France, and caused the blood of thousands of her citizens to flow in the streets of Paris. It is pleasing to turn from these unhappy forebodings, and witness the glorious examples of this noble army of Va". I arrived in time to find our "three-years-troops" enlisting by whole Brigades , voluntarily comeing forward and pledging themselves to fight for our liberties so long as there is one left to carry a musket; and that too when one fourth of them are barefooted, and when they have had nothing but bread alone to eat for six days. The world has never witnessed an example of heroism so noble & Just think of it - my dear Sister-; Men who have undergone all the hardships of a three years war, many of whom have wives and children at home and have not seen them since they enlisted; barefooted while the snow covers the earth, and with just sufficient food to deep them from actual starvation. These men I have just seen gathered to gether this cold winter day, to offer up anew, their lives upon their countries altar. &, was a noble, a sublime spectacle, and should bring hope and courage to every heart in our oppressed country. Whatever the future maybe, I shall ever feel proud to have been associated with such brave and patriotic men and should our armies elsewhere fail to drive the invader from our land, and leave them in possession of the best and lovelist portions of our Confederacy; Should all else fail; there will still be found our Old Virginia's Soil a band of braves whose love of liberty is far stronger than their fear of death; men from every southern state who were the first to enlist, and who would rather die as freemen than live as slaves. It was not my intention to bore you with so long a letter, but as I filled my first sheet before I was aware of it, I must have room now to close. I wrote you a short letter from Richmond on the 11th, I believe, but fear it will never reach you, as it was sent by mail. I will send this by private conveyance, perhaps by Albert, should he start in a day or two. I found my per pony looking well and just as greedy as ever, but there is "many o ginger cake for the little scamp now. One of my lady friends, - the wild Miss" Hattie - I told you of , has been riding her since I left, but I shall certainly put a stop to her equestrian performance at my expense. The health of our army is very good indeed at this time, and the winter has been unusually mild until now. I am very busy inspecting the Brigade and making out reports of the condition and wants of the command; but will soon have my books and papers all right once more. I believe the Medical Department of this army will soon be made the medium of of all the information the commanding genl" requires for I am now engaged on lengthy reports which should certainly have been made-out in the A. A. G's office. Sam Pryor is assisting me, and soon we will have ten feet of paper covered with all sorts of Medical-Technicalities and Military-Phrases, too hard to pronounce, and of very doubtful importance to the country when they are understood, Lou" Alexander has been enquiring particularly abot you; he is quite well, and in fine spirits. I believe there are no other of your particular friends to be mentioned, unless you allow my friend McKie that honor. He says those black eyes and killing curls of yours come very near changing his allegiance to Miss M.[F.?], and asked me more than once if I thought you were free to set in affairs of the heart. What could I tell him; of course I merely said I knew nothing of your love affairs, as you were entirely silent on the subject. I suppose that Bob & Billie have left you [ise?] By now, and I can imagine how lonely you feel. I shall write to them at Decatur soon, as that I believe is to be the Rendesvou for Morgans men. Tell sis Martha and Julia I will write to them soon, also tho the Doctor & Mother. Give my love to Aunt Jane and kiss my little pet Laney for me. Please write to me by every opportunity - dear Sister - for now that I cannot see you, my greatest delight will be to read your letters. Remember me kindly to all my friends, and believe me ever ["Sister" is a nickname Robert used for Alice Maud Matthews. Robert was courting Alice after the death of his first wife, Virginia. Alice was Robert's Sister-in-law.]
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